Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Third part: Kebab animal

One month ago, I received an e-mail from a restaurant in Northern Poland.
The subject of the mail was the Kebab animal. The owner of the restaurant wanted to know where is the Kebab animal from and how should you feed it.

This time the research has taken some time and I haven´t been able to write an answer before I was completely sure of every detail. Because of this question, I had to travel to southern Turkey and live there two weeks with nomads.
Answer comes here:

PART III: THE ORIGIN AND THE FEEDING OF KEBAB ANIMAL

Kebab animal is distant relative of reindeer and moose. 50 years ago people believed that Kebab is actually a child of moose and reindeer, little bit like a mule is a child of horse and donkey. That is not true. Kebab is an gender of its own.

The first kebab animals were seen three thousand years ago at the mountains between Turkey and Iraq. The nation of Kurdis still uses Kebab animal to do some hard work when a donkey or a horse is too big to be used. Kebab has the size of a dog but it looks a bit like a reindeer without any hair.

During the past three decades, Kebab animals have spread to other parts of Europe, most of them living nowadays in Germany. There is also other species related to Kebab, called Döner Kebab. That is a bit smaller but much more meaner animal.

You should never feed Kebab animal. It is an unanticipated beast and it´s very difficult to predict its movements. However, if you feed it, you should do it with youghurt. It will make it much more easier to approach and you should whisper the word "Iskender" at the same time.

I hope this answer shuts down your thirst of information about Kebab animal.

Monday, October 23, 2006

False information in the web

An article in last weekends NYT reveals how many people try to cheat people by writing false information in form of correct information. It tells about Hikipedia (http://hiki.pedia.ws/wiki/Etusivu) which is an unresponsible web site spreading unresponsible information.

As you know, on this site you can always trust on the information because it´s written only by me.

The third part of this encyclopedia is on its way to be published soon.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

The Second part: NOBEL PRIZE

I've got many interesting e-mails from all around the world and it was not easy to decide which subject I should discuss. The reason I chose this topic was the urgency. The writer told me that he has serious problems trying to figure out what is this mysterious Nobel Prize all the newspapers are writing about. That is why I´ll give the complete information I have about the Nobel prize.

THE NOBEL PRIZE

The Nobel Foundation was established in 1900. The first 42 years the name of the foundation was The Noble Foundation. The founders, rich Russian land-owners, didn´t want to be mixed with Alfred Nobel, a swedish scientist mostly known of inexact information, who later bought the foundation and changed its name. Originally, the idea of the foundation was to collect money from relatives of ill people and invest the money in developing of curing medicines. Later the local milises found out that the money was mostly used to develope a potable alcohol which had more than 96% of alcohol. They succeeded and nowadays it´s mostly used in the western parts of Moscows subway network.

When the foundation changed its owner, the nature and function were totally reformed. The foundation started to give these "prizes". They give the "prizes" in 9 different categories, which are the following ones:
Physics, chemistry, physiology or medicine, gymnastics, literature, peace, economics, handling of a gun and wood-handwork.

The prize is given in gold and depends on the weight of the prize getting persons husband or wife (only the first one so you can´t play with re-marrying). This is why you can see people eating huge loads of food even in the buffet dinner where the nomination is announced. Two years ago they added doping tests two the rules of foundation cause there had been rumours of steroids involved the contest.

The committee which selects the persons who get the prize, is lead by man named Art B. Handicraft. He is a distant relative of Alfred Nobel and also the chairman of the board in foundation. He lives in the southern Sweden with three former Miss Sweden candidates who are sisters. In Sweden they know him also as "Big Brother" because he is the Big Brother in this notorious TV-show.

Normally, the competitors go through three rounds in the final nomination ceremony. Those are the evening dress, swimming suit and leisure suit rounds. Swedish nomination committee observes every round and gives the competitors their starting points. These points are added to their own substance area.

Physics prize:
This prize is given to the person who has the best physics. Arnold Schwarzenegger won this prize after winning the Mister Universum prize. This is also the only category where a family has won the prize. Every member of Family Curie was very physical so the committee decided to give the prize to whole family.

Physiology or medicine prize:
Normally they give this prize to people who are using a lot of different medications. It´s a kind of motivation prize, like "keep on going"-type. I don´t know why they have this physiology part added there because it has nothing to do with the prize.

Chemistry prize:
This is the most mystical of the prizes. For the past 20 years the winners have been drawn out of the hat. Most of them have had nothing to do with chemistry, except one high school chemistry teacher from Austria who won the prize 1992.

Gymnastics prize
This prize is given to person who has the best gymnastics skills. It is normally tested in the Nobel gymnastic contest, held in August. It includes apparatus gymnastics, track and field, orienteering, Finnish baseball and avoiding the shower.
Each competitor has to wear jeans. The winner normally gets to Olympics without any other qualifications.

Literature prize
Every other year they give this prize to the person who reads the most books and every other year to the person who writes the most books. The quality of books has nothing to do with this prize. Book has to have at least 14 pages to be count as a book.

Peace prize
Surprisingly, the peace prize has been missing last six years, so they haven´t been able to give it to anyone. There are plenty of rumors about the location of the prize and the committee supposes that UN has something to do with the disappearing. They assume that in the next few years UN will try to sell the prize in black market and buy guns with the money.

Economics prize
This prize is given to the person who lives the most economical life. Since 75% of the people in the world are living in poorness, this is always a hard pick. Last year this prize went to Finland but the winner never got his prize. This middle aged workman from a paper factory did not dare to take a day off from his work on the ceremony day.

Handling of a gun prize
This is a kind of a legacy prize because in Russia this is a normal way to celebrate christmas. Everyone can take part in gun handling contests which normally last days and are very sophisticated. Don´t confuse this to Russian roulette which is the most common reason of the death in Russia. It is commonly known that no person has ever died in gun handling contest.

Wood-handwork prize
This is the newest prize and it´s the most fascinating. Some people think that it´s given to the person who carves the finest wooden handwork. This is not true. The prize is given to the person who can eat the biggest wooden handwork.
78% of the winners have died the same night.

The Nobel Prizes are all given this week. After this weeks starts the celebrating week which lasts two weeks. Then the winners normally get divorce from their fat husbands or wives and celebrate another two weeks. Also the selection committee celebrates with the gold which is left from the ceremony.

The questions from Nobel or Noble prizes can be left to the comments section where you can entry from the link below.

Sunday, October 01, 2006

Has Bill Gates got something to do with this blog?

Quote from Helsingin Sanomat kuukausiliite, October (monthly magazine of Helsingin Sanomat):
Writer: "Could Wikipedia get a rival?"
The writers´ of Wikipedia: "Maybe Bill Gates could found a competitor".

I know what everybody´s thinking now. But I can assure that Bill Gates has nothing to do with this project. You don´t have to worry about that.